For a New Beginning

In the light of the upcoming graduation, this poem inspires me to accept and welcome new changes that may seem intimidating or unclear. 

“In out-of-the-way places of the heart,

Where your thoughts never think to wander,

This beginning has been quietly forming,

Waiting until you were ready to emerge.

For a long time it has watched your desire,

Feeling the emptiness grow inside you,

Noticing how you willed yourself on,

Still unable to leave what you had outgrown.

It watched you play with the seduction of safety

And the grey promises that sameness whispered,

Heard the waves of turmoil rise and relent,

Wondered would you always live like this.

Then the delight, when your courage kindled,

And out you stepped onto new ground,

Your eyes young again with energy and dream,

A path of plentitude opening before you.

Though your destination is not clear

You can trust the promise of this opening;

Unfurl yourself into the grace of beginning

That is at one with your life’s desire.

Awaken your spirit to adventure;

Hold nothing back, learn to find ease in risk;

Soon you will be home in a new rhythm

For your soul senses the world that awaits you.” 

Here is a really cool website about cultural differences!! My favorite anecdote is the one about peeling a banana for a Russian lady. I also found the bit about eye contact interesting. 

An Exquisite Life

I know I've been posting a lot of inspirational poetry and whatnot recently, but I can't help myself! I like this one very much...

This can be the most beautiful, fulfilling day you’ve ever known. For that to happen, you have to allow it.
You have to let go of your obsession with struggling and striving for more, and enjoy the beauty of what already is here. You have to stop thinking that some new richness will fulfill you, and fully experience the richness that is already yours.
Instead of fighting your way through each moment, open yourself to the possibilities for joy. Instead of focusing so intently on what you need, dive deeply into the value of all you have.
There is a unique and exquisite life that is already yours. All you have to do, is thankfully and gracefully let it unfold.
Whatever your situation, whatever your circumstances, there is immeasurable value to be experienced in the authentic living of your life. In the beautiful truth of who you are, there are endless possibilities for magnificent fulfillment.
Let the full truth of your life unfold. And let this truly be the best day ever.

Winners and winners

There are those who win now, and those who will win later. If everyone were to win first place all at once, the victory would have no real meaning.
If you resent those who win the race, you give up a valuable opportunity. You give up the opportunity to learn from their examples.
There are those who win in one area of life, and others who win in other areas of life. If everyone was the best at the very same thing, think of how terribly tedious and predictable things would be.
Just because one person wins, or excels, or achieves, does not mean everyone else loses. Life’s victories do not happen in a vacuum, and their valuable consequences reach far beyond those who achieve them.
Choose to be inspired, to learn from, and to catch the positive energy of those who win. Then make use of that energy, and build on it to win in your very own way.
Sincerely celebrate the victories of those who win. For that makes you a winner, too.

For a New Beginning

This poem makes me think about going to college :)

“In out-of-the-way places of the heart,

Where your thoughts never think to wander,

This beginning has been quietly forming,

Waiting until you were ready to emerge.

For a long time it has watched your desire,

Feeling the emptiness grow inside you,

Noticing how you willed yourself on,

Still unable to leave what you had outgrown.

It watched you play with the seduction of safety

And the grey promises that sameness whispered,

Heard the waves of turmoil rise and relent,

Wondered would you always live like this.

Then the delight, when your courage kindled,

And out you stepped onto new ground,

Your eyes young again with energy and dream,

A path of plentitude opening before you.

Though your destination is not clear

You can trust the promise of this opening;

Unfurl yourself into the grace of beginning

That is at one with your life’s desire.

Awaken your spirit to adventure;

Hold nothing back, learn to find ease in risk;

Soon you will be home in a new rhythm

For your soul senses the world that awaits you.” 

 John O'Donohue

EVERYTHING IS WAITING FOR YOU

Your great mistake is to act the drama
as if you were alone.  As if life
were a progressive and cunning crime
with no witness to the tiny hidden
transgressions.  To feel abandoned is to deny
the intimacy of your surroundings.  Surely,
even you, at times, have felt the grand array;
the swelling presence, and the chorus, crowding
out your solo voice.  You must note
the way the soap dish enables you,
or the window latch grants you freedom.
Alertness is the hidden discipline of familiarity.
The stairs are your mentor of things
to come, the doors have always been there
to frighten you and invite you,
and the tiny speaker in the phone
is your dream-ladder to divinity.

Put down the weight of your aloneness and ease into
the conversation.  The kettle is singing
even as it pours you a drink, the cooking pots
have left their arrogant aloofness and
seen the good in you at last.  All the birds
and creatures of the world are unutterably
themselves.  Everything is waiting for you.

~ David Whyte ~

This poem serves as a reminder to soak up the life and love around you. Everything lives and loves- even the flowers greet you on your way by because each flower is a little life that breathes with the earth and all of its beings. It reminds me of one of my favorite songs, Edelweiss, from The Sound of Music. 

(Or maybe David Whyte just practiced animism... )

Weight!

Current American View!

Other views!

Phobias throughout cultures...

We learned in AP Psychology about certain culturally specific phobias. They are really interesting!!!

Culturally Specific Phobias

Common American Phobias

Stress!!!

This world is filled with stressors!!! But, as we talked about in class, different cultures have different stressors and ways of coping with stress. This link will take you to a research paper on differences between American and Chinese stress. It was probably created for those involved in cross-cultural business relationships who need some advice. Take a look!

Speaking of Time...

Last week we had a, shall I say, fierce conversation about a concept that governs our lives as Americans - TIME!!! This video describes some interesting observations about cultural differences in time. I don't agree with everything stated in the video, but it is interesting to hear different viewpoints about which "time-mind-set" is better: past, present, or future. I'd say a little bit of past and future and a whole lot of present creates a nice combination. I believe that the narrator in this video has a somewhat extreme and parochial view of present and future oriented people. This is probably because I have a different definition of present-oriented people than him.

His definition: present-oriented people only think about what is going on at exactly that moment in time (now) and never think about what will happen in the future or what their actions will bring or whether they should do something in order to change something about the present and make it better in the future. In this way they will often make mistakes or bad decisions that lead to negative outcomes.

My definition: present-oriented people have a strong tendency to "live-in-the-moment" by absorbing their current surroundings and appreciating the life around them. They do not worry about the future, but they are aware of what current events may bring or cause. Present-oriented people do not stress about the future, nor do they mourn about or regret the past. They rarely feel a need to hurry or be "pressed-for-time"because time is either a foreign concept to them or it is less important than embracing the moment.

By his definition, present-oriented people SUCK. They often have no morals, they are selfish and they always make mistakes. On the other-hand, his definition explains the EXTREME idea of present-orientation: the idea that all you think about is the present. Under this definition, I would agree that present-oriented people suck, but I would also point out that hardly any people in this world are examples of this extreme present-orientation, they only are somewhat present-oriented and partly future-oriented because they usually are aware of what present events will bring, making them (by his definition, not mine) somewhat future-oriented. If it is true that, by his definition, there are almost no totally present-oriented people in this world (with the exception of some small and isolated cultures), it is unfair to apply this concept to ALL people that display A LOT of present orientation but not ONLY future orientation, which is what he was doing. Therefore, his example of an extremely present-oriented teenage girl (representing ALL people that are only MOSTLY present-oriented by his definition) getting pregnant because she was not thinking about how unprotected sex may lead to a pregnancy can not be accurately used in an argument that all present-oriented people are worse than future-oriented people. He fails to recall his own example of future oriented people being more prone to heart disease and spending less time with their family, less time with their friends, and less time sleeping.

By my definition, present-oriented people ROCK. They are peaceful and happy and they love to absorb life in all of its richness and beauty. Also, just to be clear about what I mean by present-oriented people, they are only oriented around the present. 

My definition of orient...

Orient: to familiarize oneself with or relate to

Therefore, they don't shield their mind to the past or future, but they accept and are aware of the past and future, but embrace the present and expend their mind and body into the present. In other words, they familiarize and relate themselves to the present (hence the idea of being present-oriented).

So yeah, I'm right and he's wrong... well, about that part of the video at least. I did agree with him about other things though, but I feel less of a need to explain those because, well, there's no argument to be made... unless YOU disagree with me.... *raises eyebrows suspiciously*... Ok, so I'm not actually that egotistic but my fingers are tired from typing and I have other homework to do. Sooooo... thanks for reading this novel-like post and I hope you have a lovely day! Now I am going to bed... Zzzzzzzzz..........

Culture Colors!

look! different cultures have totally different perspectives on colors! 

Interesting site on cultural issues...

This website was created for counseling purposes but it was interesting to read because, while the content itself wasn't exactly anything new, it made me think about how uninformed many people are about cultural differences. It's a little scary!!! 

Watch those peace signs!!

Go to this link: Cultural Differences in Body Language

Me, Myself, and I

For a long time I've noticed that Americans generally talk about themselves all the time. That doesn't mean that Americans are self centered, but it does say something about our culture. We are very self-oriented people that build our lives around what is best for us (and the people we love). In American culture, it is considered the norm to talk about one's self and relate one's personal experiences to other's experiences - this is just the way we interact. Other cultures, however, may hear us and think that we are all self-righteous and conceited because all we do is say me, myself, and I while other cultures speak more of their families, friends, towns, villages, and neighborhoods. Today all I have is a question. What are the pros and cons of talking more about one's life and experiences versus one's friends and families lives and experiences?

I just want to sip my tea!

Today I woke up at two pm. My eyes were tired, my body was tired, my brain was tired. There was almost nothing that could entice me to remove my lethargic self from those silky warm blankets. The mattress sucked me in, enveloping my shoulders and my legs in a gentle, yet, almost magnetic embrace. One could compare the feeling to a small pebble being dropped into a sweet, intoxicating mug of tea - the liquid pulling it in and wrapping itself around the pebble, lulling it into a soft sleep.

I felt heavy. As I laid there, flashes of my responsibilities piled in my head, weighing me down and pressing against the brim of my skull. Get up get up get up!!! I would not get up. I was paralyzed with exhaustion and apathy towards the apparent urgency of my work. Why should I have this awful press of guilt inside of me whenever I take time to relax? Why should I deprive myself of the simple pleasures in life in order to "get everything finished"? Is anything ever actually finished? Is there ever a day when I have absolutely nothing to do? Those are the days that I long for, that everyone longs for, but never actually gets. A moment of clarity is soon interrupted by something tick-tick-ticking in ones head - an alarm sounding off whenever someone's spent "too long" away from their responsibilities.

Many days I just want to sit in the sun on my back porch on a cool afternoon, dressed in something soft and comfortable - unlike my stiff kakis and jeans that confine me to the movements of those binding fabrics. I want to sit there and sip my tea, any kind of tea, and think of nothing but the smell of the trees and the rays of sunshine on my skin and the slight breeze across my face and the sweet warmth of my tea, sinking into it like that little lucky pebble. I would sit there for hours and breathe in and out, sipping my tea.  I would sit there for hours and do nothing else.

But I can't.

Instead I have to hurriedly gulp it down trying to savor every sweet drop of tea that I can while it lasts because I have to study or I have to do homework or I have to do the laundry or I have to clean the dishes or I have to practice piano or I have to clean my room or I have to do call someone or I have to do something that I forgot to do yesterday! Have to have to have to! Do I have to? No. In reality, I don't have to do any of these things and the fact that I have trouble enjoying them simply because they are there to be done is only my fault. The fact that I cannot relax without feeling guilty about it is only my fault. The fact that I "don't have time to relax" is not only my fault, but it's not even true! I have lots of time to relax! In fact, I have the rest of my life to relax. I simply choose to spend that time working, worrying, and not relaxing instead.

Now, I know that I am not the only one who has this problem. I am positive that every person in the United States could read this and relate to it in some way, shape, or form. What I am not positive about is whether someone from Rome or Lima or New Guinea or New Deli could say the same. My question is, why? Why are Americans so scheduled and orderly? Why are they so obsessed with saving time? Why do they punish themselves for relaxing when they have work to do? Why do they set handwork on such a high pedestal? Do they believe that handwork pays off in the end leading to ultimate happiness and time for relaxation? Because if happiness and relaxation is what we are aiming for right now, why not be happy and relaxed right now? I suppose Americans, including myself, lead themselves into this facade of assurance that by rushing through our days trying to do everything perfectly and get everything done and   suck the best out of everything we can, then eventually, there will come a day when we have time to do nothing and need nothing and want nothing. Well, I can say right now that that day will never come - that is, it will never come through the stressful technique we are using now.


This idea that we must feel guilty for not working can only lead us to exhaustion.

If we want to be happy and stress free, we should be happy and stress free.

Why not? We are here aren't we? We are breathing, aren't we?  We are alive, aren't we?

Yes, we are! And so am I. So I stayed in bed and lost myself in daydreams, dizzying off every once in a while and slipping into that delicious cup of dreams. It was so quiet. And I didn't feel the least bit guilty...  for the most part...

My standing question is: How can the United States come to value life's pleasures as much as work?

Kitchen Cultures!

One of my very good friends lives down the street I spend a lot of time at her house where she lives with her mom. Both she and her mom are Chinese and I notice many cultural differences between her family and mine. The most significant differences are about food - my favorite topic! One of the more obvious differences is that we often eat with chopsticks (and I must say that I am becoming quite skilled at the art of using that particular utensil!), but, I have used chopsticks many times before and we even have a drawer of chopsticks at my house. Another difference is that, while each of us have our own bowl, we all eat from the same platters and dishes, sometimes putting food into our own bowl, and sometimes eating the food straight from the platters. I like eating from one big dish but I know that if my sister or I tried to eat straight from platters and plates at our table we'd get fussed at because it spreads germs and it's rude! Another difference is that they always have food lying around the kitchen that they pick at throughout the day. My mom NEVER leaves food out (except cookies...) because she is afraid of getting food poisoning and attracting bugs. Also, when I visit my friend's house, I am always urged to eat everything I want, whereas in my house, my family always offers food and drinks to guests but doesn't push them to eat it.

I spent some time thinking about some reasons that there are these differences between my families food habits and my friend's family's food habits and it came down to this theory: my family's lifestyle is very American and is always concerned about cleanliness, saving, and instant gratification, whereas my friend's culture, while influenced significantly by American culture, is also influenced by her Chinese culture and is concerned with not wasting anything and using what you have. This is why my family worries about germs, bugs, and saving what food we have, and her family leaves food out so that they can finish it by the end of the day, offer lots of food to me when I visit, and they also eat from platters of the main dish so as not to take too much of a serving and waste what they didn't eat. This is all just a theory but I would love to here other interpretations as well!

Amour! Hayam! Liebe! Amor! Kaerlighed! Love!

In the spirit of the upcoming holiday, I did a little research on ways that different cultures from different countries celebrate Valentine's Day. Here are some websites I found that discuss the various ways that people from all over the world celebrate love.

Valentine's Day Around the Globe: How Other Cultures Celebrate

Valentine's Day Around the World

Tradition's From Around the World at St. Valentine's Net

Culture Shock!

This video is an example of "culture shock," stressing how two cultures that are geographically so close to each other can be "shockingly" different.

World Population Facts!

This website still "awes" me overtime I visit it.